Pressure

I thought you all would enjoy reading this poem that I wrote last night. I wrote it about how I've been feeling lately. It describes the immense amount of pressure I've been feeling lately. I am currently getting certified to be a paralegal and next semester I have to do an internship, so I've been searching for a law firm to do it at. With that, I need to pick one that has people who are going to be able to give me a wealth of knowledge about being a paralegal and prepare me for a career. In May, I will be finished with my certification and will be looking for a job and with that, an apartment. I will finally be moving out of my parents house after sucking money out their wallets like leaches do blood from a body. My head has been spinning because of all of the pressures that I feel are on top of me right now, endless decisions need to be made. I want to do what's right to ensure a good future for myself so that I am not living paycheck to paycheck and unhappy. 

At times I feel every nerve in my body

They all pulsate as my body grows tense

Rushes of anxiety and fear creep through me

What is the next step twenty years from now?

I feel like I always need to have a plan mapped out.

Part of it is the nurture I have learned

The man who raised me who has a routine

A routine for every inch of his waking life

He has engrained into my brain to plan, always plan

Part of it is all the people on the outside

Constantly taking a big gulp every time I say I'm 23

Yes I am still in school and living at home

Yes I still rely on mommy and daddy financially

Stop the pressure that constantly surrounds me

It makes me feel like everything I do has to be perfect

Bills, loans, marriage, kids, dog, salary, work

Everything life brings seems so filled with pressure

But please, pressure, stop bothering me. 

I know it's nothing much. But it's how I can turn my feelings into words on a paper. I know it's not 100% "poetic" in its format, but it's how it came out of me, in a natural state. 

Reading is Glorious

Reading is such an entertaining thing to do. If I could, I would read for a living. It's so much fun and I love diving into the minds of other writers and exploring their imaginations. Or if it's a non-fiction book, sometimes it can be a great learning experience. Here are some books that I've read recently that you might enjoy.

Novels:

The Beautiful Disaster series by Jamie McGuire:
These include Beautiful Disaster, Walking Disaster, the novella Beautiful Wedding,
and the blog post Mrs. Maddox. There is a third novel entitled Beautiful Oblivion that I have not read. However, the others that I mentioned of the series are simply powerful. They're a great and easy read for women. These are not the typical romance novel. Jamie McGuire puts a twist on the main story that follows Travis Maddox and Abby Abernathy. The first book is told from Abby's side of the story, then the follow up (Walking Disaster) is told from Travis' point of view. These books are true page turners and very hard to put down. The main novels are available in libraries if you are trying to save money, but also can be purchased online for Kindle or in book stores. 

(Image from: www.goodreads.com)

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini:
This book changed my perspective on life and the middle-east. This story follows Amir, the son of wealthy man. He grows up living with his widowed father in Afghanistan during the dying years of the Afghan monarchy. Amir is best friends with Hassan, his servant's son. Amir struggles to decide what is right and wrong in his years of growing up wealthy being friends with a rejected outcast, servant's boy. This book is full of life lesson, action, heartbreak, war, etc. And when you are done reading, there is a movie based off the book. 

(Image from: www.goodreads.com)

Teen:

Elsewhere by Gabrielle Zevin:
This book was written for teens, but I believe a person of any age could enjoy this novel. Zevin takes a unique outlook on the afterlife through the eyes of Liz Hall, a teenager who has passed away after being hit by a taxi while riding her bicycle. She struggles to accept her death and longs to be back on Earth. Follow this heartwarming story as Liz makes her journey to Elsewhere. 

(Image from: www.goodreads.com)

Autobiography:

Are You There Vodka, It's Me Chelsea by Chelsea Handler:
This book is hysterical. You may know Chelsea Handler from being the host of "Chelsea Lately" on E!, which recently ended its final season. Chelsea, for those of her taste, is a comedic genius. She has a powerful, say anything personality. She isn't afraid to be herself and enjoy life to the fullest. In this book that she wrote, she tells several short stories from her past starting from childhood, going to adulthood. They are funny, crude, and down right entertaining. 

(Image from: www.goodreads.com)

History:

Seneca Falls and the Origins of the Women's Rights Movement by Sally G. McMillen:
This book tells the story of Seneca Falls, the revolutionary convention that changed the history of the women's rights movement in America. I actually read this in one of my history classes at UCONN and thoroughly enjoyed it. I recommend it highly to all interested in history or women's rights. 

(Image from: www.goodreads.com)

If you have any books that you want me to read/review, email me at: jessica_panza@yahoo.com 

My Harry Potter-ish Room

Anybody who knows me, knows that I have a bit of an obsession with the Harry Potter books and movies. If you read my previous post about my tattoos, you will see that I have the Deathly Hallows symbol tattooed on my back. I have always been interested in magic and witches and wizards. I loved watching movies like The Craft and Practical Magic growing up. My favorite season so far of American Horror Story was "Coven." So clearly, I was bound to get hooked on the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling created a series that any young adult could get into. I remember being in 5th grade and playing with a fellow classmate at recess pretending we were in a wizarding duel. We imitated different spells like "expelliarmus" and the dreadful "avada kadavra." We used sticks as our wands and probably looked like two idiots, but we didn't care. We were having fun and no matter how much anyone made fun of us, we shared an interest in the magic and loved letting our imaginations explore during our free time. I often wonder if that girl remembers playing with me, pretending we were witches. It would be quite the story to laugh at together. 

This fascination of mine has continued into adulthood. I have enjoyed reading all 7 books, plus the supplement books and am now reading a book about the making of the 8 movies entitled "Harry Potter: Page to Screen, the Complete Filmmaking Journey." It's so good. It's a giant book that might take you a while to read. I'm sure it's expensive, so I checked it out from my local library. It is filled with amazing pictures of concept drawings, the actors at work, the locations they filmed at, and more. You should check it out if you're a HP fan. 

I am also a member of Pottermore. I was proudly sorted into Ravenclaw house. If you are a HP fan and are not part of Pottermore, you need to get on it. It is so much fun. It's a site run by J.K. Rowling and a team of graphic designers and web designers who have created moments for each chapter of the books. Every few months they release new moments. They are currently up to Book 4. Also, you can brew potions, duel students from other houses, and explore Diagon Alley and read some posts from the Daily Prophet. 

Anyways, let me get to what I intended to show you today, my bedroom, filled with Harry Potter things. I don't have nearly as much as other people out there, but I definitely have more than the average person. 

First up, I have 3 1,000 piece puzzles on my wall

Next, I have an autographed picture of Dan Radcliffe

And of course I have all 7 books, 8 movies and 3 supplement books on one of my shelves

I was gifted this HP Xmas Ornament that stays out all year round

And last but not least, I have the art projects:

A poster with "Muggle" written on it and the deathly hallows symbol

and the 4 house crests below it

And then I have a painted wooden block with my name and the deathly hallows symbol

And there you have it... My nerdy, Harry Potter room. Might have to get HP bedding next!

Sex: The Key to a Happy Long-Term Relationship

A very important aspect of long-term relationships is probably the juiciest to discuss: SEX.  I want to talk to you about the importance of having a healthy sex life with your partner.  I have met many couples that are unhappy with their relationship because they are not on the same page when it comes to sex.  Sex is a way for a couple to connect and be intimate with each other, and it gives us personal satisfaction.  So what are the aspects of sex in a relationship that need to be focused on?

Partners need to be open with one another about their own needs and wants:

-A lot of people have an issue with not being outward with their partner. For example, they are not speaking up about the things that they want to try in bed, or when their partners are doing something wrong, they don’t speak up. The person with the desires will get nervous about how their partner will react to their suggestions. This is a problem that needs to be worked out. You should be able to feel comfortable speaking with your partner about these topics or else you won’t be able to have your needs met and your problems fixed. And on the other hand, your partner should be open minded to your suggestions. If you are asking to try something, they have every right to say that they don’t feel comfortable doing it and that’s okay. But you need to feel comfortable and confident with trying to get through to them. It may be difficult the first couple times, but it will get easier as times goes on.

(Pic from: http://www.lovesceneonline.com/dating/secrets-lies-and-surprises/)

Be open-minded to your partner’s requests:

-Just like you need to be willing to speak up, you also need to be willing to listen and try new things. If your partner has something they want to try, like role-playing or eating food off of each other, you should be willing to give it a shot. If it is something you really feel is going to make you feel uncomfortable, then discuss this with your partner and try to figure out a compromise. Also, if your partner has something that they want you to change about your technique, don’t be offended. Listen and realize that you two are learning about each other’s bodies and what makes each other feel pleasured. There’s nothing wrong with getting something wrong and practicing to improve. A great part of being in a relationship is getting to learn so much about each other’s pleasure spots and growing as a couple together, sexually.

(Pic from: http://dailytimewithgod.com/?p=7106)

Try to be spontaneous:

-Don’t always plan your time to be intimate. Being spontaneous and random when getting intimate with your partner can bring more spark and fun into your relationship.

(Pic from: http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/categories/departments/decoration/10759/)

Switch things up a bit:

-Don’t always have sex with your partner exactly the same way. Try different positions or maybe don’t always do it in bed. Try different places like on top of the washer machine, or on the couch, or on the floor. Switching up the spots you have sex can also contribute to the spontaneity of your sexual life.

 (Pic from: http://www.shutterstock.com/video/clip-2603993-stock-footage-couple-lays-in-front-of-the-fireplace-laughing-and-talking.html)

Don’t Rush:

-This is a common problems for men. They get too eager and rush the whole process. Women need to be taken care of. Sometimes a woman will get dressed up in a sexy outfit and the man will see her and immediately strip her of her clothes. A woman does not enjoy this because she feels as though the time and thought she put into that outfit was wasted. Try slowing things down. Take the time to kiss her where she wants to be kissed, and to slowly remove her clothes, nibble at her ears and neck, do things that are going to really get her aroused. Women cannot turn on like a switch of light like men can.

Don’t let your man do all of the work:

-This is a common problem for women. They want to just lay there and let their guy give it to them. WRONG! Men want women to take control in the bedroom. A couple should take turns in being the dominator and dominated.

(Pic from: http://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/young-woman-dominating-high-res-stock-photography/163693139)

Trust

-Trust is not only important to the relationship itself, but it’s important to your sexual relationship as well. If you can’t trust your partner in bed, you cannot feel truly comfortable.

I know that I probably have not hit every single topic about sex, but this will give you a start to having a very healthy sexual relationship with your partner. I wish you and your partner a fulfilled and pleasured sex life. Have fun!

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me at jessica_panza@yahoo.com